Red Mist, Blue Moon
by HOC97
Summary: This is an alturnitve to how Bella meets her baby Renesmee. this may turn out to be a load of one shots or mini stories
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

**Authors note:**

**This starts off when Edward and Bella come back from hunting and everyone is weary about how Bella is going to react around Renesmee **

Edward and I came out of the woods where we were greeted by Jacob. My best friend had stuck around. Why?

"Bella" he said in a _Nice to see you_ sort of tone. He stopped a few feet away from us "Well." He breathed "I didn't expect you to look so…you" he shrugged

"Nice to see you too Jake" I laughed back. Just like old times.

"Right, well, let's get this show on the road. C'mon, Bells. Do your worst" he stepped in closer until I could feel the heat from his body between us "I'm getting old here, Bella" Jacob taunted "Okay not technically, but you get the idea. Go on, take a whiff."

Nervously, I took a tiny breath in through my nose and braced for anything "Huh I can see what everyone is going on about. You stink, Jacob"

"Thanks and you smell like a basket of roses!" he said sarcastically rolling his eyes but soon laughed back.

"Are you sure she's ready?"

"I'm sure Jacob. She's different from the other new-borns"

"Wait. Didn't that other one tell you what she saw?"

"No. What?"

It was almost as if I wasn't there anymore.

"Still here you know! Anyway what did Alice see Jake?"

"She said she saw you attacking someone. She can't tell when"

There was a deafening silence as everyone seriously reconsidered the whole idea. I could hear her little heart beating inside, just a few meters away from me, and, yes, I could hear her breathing and just about see the top of her head.

I hadn't realised that Carlisle had come outside until Edward nudged me back to earth. "Bells" he said "sorry Carlisle, what did you say?" I said to Carlisle apologetically. "I said do you think you're able for this?" I had to think hard about this I could be putting my baby at risk by being in the same room as her. "I don't know Carlisle, I could kill her" I whispered, barely able to speak. That thought scared me to death, I would never put my baby at risk, all I want to do is to keep her safe; Even if that means staying away from her.

"We wouldn't let that happen, Bella" Edward said reassuringly

"Even still, I could hurt her Edward!" I said, and I can't say anymore or I will start to cry, Even if I can't my voice will give me away.

"I agree with her, Carlisle. She _could_ hurt her or worse and I'm not prepared to take that risk, are you?" Rosalie said coming out of the house. Weird, Rose has never agreed with anything I've said before, except keeping Renesmee.

"I suppose you're right, but this _is_ your decision Bella"

I take a deep breath "I'm not putting my baby at risk" these are definitely my last words. I tune out after that all I hear is Carlisle saying "maybe you two should go back into the woods for a few more hours" and then we start walking until we get about five miles into the woods, then we climb a very tall tree and we just sit there in silence.

"You going to say anything to me at all?" Edward asked after about two hours. He'd been watching me since we left the house. I open my mouth to say something but instead it just comes out in tearless sobs. I feel Edward's big arms around me telling me it's all right.

"I'm sorry" I say amongst the sobs

"For what?" Edward said in the same soothing voice

"I should've listened to you; I should've never had her because now she's in danger of being killed by me! And I just ….." I'm broken off by sobs again.

"Shhh." Edward said "I'm glad you didn't listen to me. She's one of the best things that's ever happened to me and she'll be the best thing that's happened to you too. Don't cry Bella, please" he kisses the top of my head and rubs my back and we stay like this for another five hours.

It's about ten when we get back to the house, they're keeping me just ten metres away from the stairs and Jasper, Emmet and Edward are sitting are sitting a little too close for comfort. Alice and Rosalie are sitting by the stairs when we hear Renesmee stir in her sleep and then we hear her cry.

That sound practically tore me up inside. I suddenly clutched Edward's hand as if I was in pain, and in many ways I was. Rosalie ran up the stairs faster than I ever saw her before. I heard her murmuring sweet baby things to try and get her back to sleep. I should be the one up there saying those things to her.

"Go up to her" I tell Edward "she needs one of us and if I can't go up to her you have to. "Ok" Edward said and he went upstairs as well. I heard him arguing with Rosalie "its fine Edward, I got this" "just give her to me Rose, she wants me or Bella and she can't have Bella"

Just then Jacob came in "God I could hear you a mile away, what's wrong?"

"She started crying, we don't know why?" Emmet said with a stern look.

"Ok I'll go up to her" Jacob said and he ran upstairs.

Wait Jacob was going upstairs to Renesmee? Last I checked he was ready to kill her. Then I heard Edward say to Jacob "I wonder how she'll react when she finds out?" I was immediately at the bottom of the stairs the second they came down.

"Find out what?" I demanded looking directly at Jacob

"It's nothing really" Jacob said with a half-hearted grin on his face

I looked at really closely then I looked back at Emmet who was trying hard not to laugh; that's when it hit me; "You didn't" I spat with the word "KILL" in my eyes. Before I knew it my arms were behind my back by Emmet and Jasper.

"Bella if you're going to argue with him, go outside" Carlisle said sternly

They let me go and I'm so ready to kill him it's insane. The second we're outside I scream at him; "You stupid mutt! How can you do that she's just a baby!"

"Bella you know that I had no say in this" Jacob said, his hands up in defence

"I haven't even held her yet and you think you have some moronic wolfy claim to her?" I screeched at him.

"It was involuntary" he said running backwards now as I stalked him.

"I don't care if it was or not Jacob! Stay away from her!"

"You know I can't do that Bella" he said like he had no choice

"Try starting now" I said through gritted teeth

"she likes me too Bells. Remember how you wanted me around so much three days ago, that's gone from you now isn't it? That was her" he said trying to reason with me. This just irritated me further I let out a bell shriek and lunged for his throat.

**Authors note: hi guys I know that a lot of this is copied from the book but I'm trying to put my own twist on it this may turn out to be a load of one shots based on the same thing but we'll see :} :) **

**Please review :) :) **


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors note:**

**This takes place after Bella tries to kill Jacob and Seth gets in the way and Bella hurts him instead (and so on; you know the story ) :) (This will be will be mostly Bella's thoughts)**

Ok, I'm really sorry about hurting Seth and I really didn't mean to hurt him but I'm still going to kill Jacob. I'm outside the door with Edward, Emmet and Jasper because one; they don't think I should be in the house near Renesmee and two; I can't even stand being in the same room as _him_. My mind is racing with the thought that Jacob imprinted on my little baby I so want to kill him the hatred is practically radiating off me and you don't have to be Jasper to see that.

Edward took my hand and walked with me to the back of the house, we stopped just under one of the windows that had a tree just across from it.

"Do you want to see her" Edward asked looking deep into my eyes with deep concern and concentration.

I just stared at him for half a second then nodded silently not quite managing to say "yes" probably because I was shocked that he even said that and also because I didn't want Rosalie to hear it. He pointed to the tree up above us and we quickly climbed till we reached the part that was directly across from the window and there, was the little girl I had fought so hard to keep, asleep in her white crib looking so beautiful and angel like as she stirred in her sleep, she opened her eyes and I gasped as I saw my old human eyes looking back at me. She reached her hand out to me and I desperately wanted to touched I reached my hand out slightly but then recoiled as I thought of all the terrible things new-borns were capable of her gorgeous brown eyes immediately filled with tears that made way for a high pitched cry that went through me like a spear and I just wanted to pick her up and hold her and tell her not to cry.

Then all of a sudden we were on the ground and I heard Rosalie comfort her instead taking my place, my words. I should be the one up there comforting her, telling not to cry. Edward took my hand and pulled me around to the back of the house just before Emmet and Jasper came to we were standing. We came to the other side of the house and he sat me down next to him. I felt like I had been stabbed a hundred times over and I was still standing unable to run from this person that kept throwing spears directly at my heart. I put my head on Edward's shoulder and he put his arm around me just as Emmet and Jasper rounded the corner.

"You two okay?" Emmet said looking at me with complete suspicion that we somehow had a part to play in Renesmee waking up.

"Ya we're fine" Edward said as he guessed I couldn't talk or even look up from the patch of grass that kept me from going into a mental break down.

I knew Jasper could feel how I felt and looked at Edward as if to tell him how I felt he suddenly had his arm tighter around me.

"Ok then we'll go back inside call us if you need us" Jasper said looking at Edward again.

I said nothing at least not until had control of myself again. Edward didn't say anything either he just stared at. I knew this wasn't fair to do to him and I wasn't going to, he needs me to stay strong as well, try to control myself and be able to have a relationship with my daughter in a year. I looked at Edward and he knew straight away what I was thinking he squeezed my hand and said "Are you sure?" I nodded still not able to talk. "Ok then" he said smiling and kissing me.

"C'mon I've got to show you something" he said taking my and walking me into the woods.

"Wait!" we heard a loud belle call which could only belong to my favourite pixie like sister in-law.

"You said if you were going to show her I could come to!" she shouted at Edward and decking him in the head. He caught her hand and pushed her out at arm's length

"First of all Alice I said you could come if I thought Bella was able to handle your annoying ambiance and right now I don't think she can. Secondly that hurt!" he said getting her.

"Well too bad I'm coming like it or not" she said sticking her tongue out at him. She grabbed my hand suddenly and I jerked away at the fast movement Edwards arms were immediately around me. "It's all right Bella" he wisped in my ear.

"Sorry Alice, You scared me" I said apologetically I really didn't mean it.

"It's fine I shouldn't have grabbed you without warning" she said in her usual bubbly tone.

"C'mon" she held her hand out for me to take it this time. I took it and she squeezed it reassuringly and we walked into the dark woods together.

**Authors note**

**Hi hope you like this chapter. Sorry it's a bit soppy at the end but I kind of ran out of ideas and I wanted to finish this in the last class of the year. HAPPY SUMMER EVERYONE! =. Please review xx.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Authors note:**

**I decided to skip on a few months after Bella's transformation. I didn't want to get into the whole Bella going to see her house thing, :)). Enjoy!**

"Are you sure you don't want to come with us?" Edward asked as he was about to walk out the door. They were all going hunting; Edward, Esmee, Rosalie, Emmet, Alice and Jasper. Carlisle was staying behind to do some paper work from the hospital and Renesmee was in her room.

We decided that I was in control enough to be in the same room as her, but, here's the thing, Renesmee didn't know me as her mother she knew me as her "Daddy's mate" and nothing more. It broke my heart that I couldn't have a relationship with my daughter but maybe it was better this way, I mean I wasn't there for the first few months of her life and Rosalie was. Renesmee knows Rose as her mother anyway, she's the one she calls out for when she has a bad dream, the one she runs to when she gets back from Jacob's and she's the one that tucks her into bed every night. And as far as we knew I could still snap at any given moment.

"It's ok. Go. I'll be fine here" I said to Edward at the door.

"Are you sure?"

"Go" I said sternly "go and you can _tell_ me about it later" I said winking at him. He kissed me passionately then we were interrupted by whistling and the calling of "sexy!" by the one and only Emmet.

"Get lost Emmet!" I shouted at him.

"Since when have you ever heard of a vampire getting lost" he called back. I shot him a look that said _when I tore him to pieces, burned him and_ _scattered his ashes in the four corners of the earth._

He got the message and jogged into the woods laughing.

"Bye" Edward said kissing me again. I closed the door behind him and watched as he sprinted into the woods to catch up with the others. I sat on the couch reading a book at inhuman speed. I was done in an hour, so I was kind of board.

I found myself wandering up stairs and sitting by the window in Edwards's room. I noticed that I was sitting on some sort of doll. It was a soft plush doll with red yarn like hair and a green Irish dancing dress with black ballet slippers. I looked at the doll and smoothed out its hair. It smelled like Renesmee sweet like honey and roses. Just then I heard the small pattering of feet coming into the room. She was looking for something. Normally I'm not allowed within 6 metres of her just in case I do snap and the boys can hold me back and rose can get Renesmee out of the room.

"Is this your doll?" I said handing it out to her. Her eyes lit up and smiled at me when she saw her doll. She reached her hand out to me and I backed away from it immediately from total shock. I never had any contact with her it was so strange.

She looked shocked as well, but also hurt. I immediately felt bad for backing away from her, it wasn't her fault it was just….. But then I realised why would I hurt my daughter? I leaned in closer to her and she touched my face. I gasped at what I saw it was me handing her the doll with the weird feeling of "Thank you" in this image. What had just happened?

Just then Carlisle came through the doorway.

"Nessie, come with me. I need to measure you now" he said and shot me a warning glance.

"Carlisle I …" I started to say but he waved me off

"We'll talk about this later" he said leading my daughter away to his office.

Well that went _grate_, _my first contact with my daughter and also my last_. Like hell is Rosalie going to let me see her after this.

_A few hours later…_

Rosalie went upstairs to put Renesmee to bed. Edward had already said goodnight to her, so we were all sitting around partly listening to Emmet go on about some bear that he caught when suddenly Edward looked at me and said; "Please say you didn't". Before I could say anything back Rosalie came storming down the stairs.

"You went near her!" she accused "I can't believe you would put at risk like that!"

"I gave her, her doll Rosalie!" I shouted back at her because she was being ridiculous

"You could've killed her!" she said lunging for my hair. I managed to hold her back until Emmet restrained her.

"I wouldn't hurt my own baby!" I shouted and as soon as those words came out of my mouth I wished they hadn't. You could see it in her eyes, a mixture of heartbreak and pure fury.

"Your baby" she said slowly.

"No. Rose, I...I didn't mean it like that…" I stuttered

"No, No you said _your baby_. She will never be your baby!" she shouted. I instantly felt bad for saying that she was mine she wasn't, not really Rose raised her I didn't.

"Mommy?" we all looked up at the small voice after a few moments of silence and all any of us could think was _Oh God_. She had heard it all and seen most of it.

She had tears in her eyes as Rosalie moved towards her but she ran away into her room.

"Go up to her Edward" I barely whispered so only he could hear me. He moved from my side to go upstairs. The silence in the room was defining; we were all just standing there not knowing what to say. Then Carlisle spoke up.

"Ok. You two need to go outside and sort this out." He said after a few minutes of silence

"I have _nothing_ to say to her" Rosalie spat through gritted teeth. I just glared at her she was the one that said it was _best_ for me and for Renesmee to stay away from each other. She planned this from the very first moment.

Edward came down the stairs about half an hour later; he had finally gotten her to sleep.

"How is she?" Rosalie and I said in unison then shot each other death glares.

Edward looked at both of us for a fraction of a second then said "Confused and right now I don't blame her, I mean first off you two shouting when you know she can hear you! And second bringing up the fact that Bella is her biological mother is unbelievable!" he wasn't exactly shouting, more or less had his voice raised slightly and he had a point we were both wrong to shout in front her.

"I'm sorry Rose I shouldn't have said she was my baby you're her mother you've always been there for her when I wasn't" I said.

"I'm sorry for attacking you" she said back. We felt it was kind of awkward to hug so we just half smiled at each other.

**Author's note:**

**Sorry for the late update:(.This is the chapter I have been looking forward to writing the most, hope you enjoyed it. please review I love them all :)))))))))))))))) xx**


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